Thursday, October 28, 2010

Yikes. What is going on, Marie Claire?

So...we've been doing a LOT of talking about farts and poop on here.  Amazingly, this was not intentional.  I guess we just talk about poop a lot.
Anyway, I figured I would go ahead and steer the topic into another direction.  Let's talk about what is going on with Marie Claire.  In the past month or so, Marie Claire has been causing a whole lot of drama and upset amongst the cyber world and beyond.
I'll give a quick summary of the drama they've stirred up.  And I'll try not to laugh, because it's so hilariously hypocritical and stupid, I don't even know what is going on over there.
The first piece that got everyone fired up, especially in the "healthy living" blogging community was this article which was supposed to be some sort of expose on how healthy living blogs (or rather, some of the most popular healthy living blogs) are actually spurring on anorexia and causing readers to hold themselves up to unachievable standards.  This article seemed to be poorly researched and really defamatory to a bunch of bloggers who are doing a pretty bang-up job of tracking workouts and healthy recipes and generally talking about being good to your body.  Obviously, with these blogs being popular, the backlash from the article was harsh and immediate, and a quick glimpse at Marie Claire's Facebook page is a great way to get a view of how upset people are over what was written.
Next, Marie Claire has one of its bloggers write this piece on how it's gross to watch fat people on television.  I read the article with a general look of "Is this chick for real?"  Apparently yes, she is.  And while I do believe that everyone has their right to their own opinion, I also hope that the editors at Marie Claire are getting what they were hoping for - whatever that is.  Maybe clicks on their website?
Are they hoping to make themselves stand out in the crowd by being controversial? 
Does anyone else just sit back and laugh at how ridiculously hypocritical it is that they blasted a bunch of healthy living bloggers for supposedly selling an ideal about being skinny, then go ahead and post a blog entry on how 'gross' it is to watch fat people kiss?
I literally laughed out loud today when I was on the treadmill at the gym and saw that the Today show was interviewing Emme and Rachel Sklar about the piece, and happened to mention that Marie Claire and the writer of this article, Maura Kelly declined to participate in their piece about the article.  Sometimes it's easier to hide behind the keys of your laptop.
I, for one, am super curious as to how Marie Claire tries to bounce back from this one.  Although I am not planning on picking up one of their magazines to find out.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

All about the poop

This morning I did what every parent ends up doing at some time, or rather, all the time.  I went to the bathroom with the door open.  In the meantime, Goose ran rampant about the upstairs, basically going back and forth between his bedroom and my bedroom.  At one point, kiddo ran into the bathroom and ripped the side of his diaper.  Yes, on purpose.  I should mention that he was wearing a pajama top and his diaper.  His pants hadn't made it back on after our morning diaper change.
Anyway, he ripped open the side of his diaper, then ran back out of the bathroom.  On a side note, our house is babyproofed within an inch of it's life, because Goose is into EVERYTHING.  I was...ahem...otherwise incapacitated, and crossed my fingers that Goose would be okay until I could go grab him and put a new diaper on him.
Sadly, I was out of luck.  About a minute later, kiddo runs back into the bathroom with no diaper on and poop on his hands.  I quickly scooped him up and sat him on the side of the sink and washed his hands.  Of course now his hands were clean, but now there was poop on our countertop.  Ewww....
Then I went on a mission to find the origin of the poop.
I found the diaper in the hallway, completely empty.  Bad sign.
Sure enough, there was poop in our room.  Right next to my husband's alarm clock, which he loves to play with.  This means that at some point, in the 5 minutes that Goose was diaper-less, he managed to squat and drop a deuce.   I guess the scariest part about this story is that poop does not gross me out anymore.  
I believe that the acceptance of poop in all it's forms is a big hurdle you jump as you become a parent.  I distinctly remember a few years ago when a friend who was just a couple of months into parenthood texted me that she woke up with poop on her finger.  She had changed a dirty diaper in the middle of the night, and then collapsed back in her bed, still stuck in the new parent exhaustive cloud.  This story horrified the non-parent version of me, and while I laughed at my friend, I just couldn't fathom this happening in my lifetime.  Now?  Barely a parenting veteran, I couldn't understand more.
Feel free to share your best poop story!  I would love to know who else is in the thick of it, so to speak...

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

The cold and flu season begins....

You know once you get your first cold it's that time of year "Cold and Flu Season".  It seems this year it is starting early around here.  Not only do I have a raging cold but there is a terrible flu bug going around and yes my sister, her husband, and Goose have it.   I have a record of getting the stomach flu and ending up in the hospital. Last year I got it twice and ended up both times in the hospital.  So staying away from them this week.
The best thing of course is rest, fluids, and taking it easy on your stomach so no pounding pizza and hot peppers.  One doctor told me to take kaopectate which I did last time and it really worked wonders, big believer in that over Pepto.  As for when your little one gets it...definitely call your pediatrician and follow whatever they say.  Last time my son got sick with a stomach bug and was having a hard time getting motivated to drink something I pulled out popsicles and that worked like a charm.  They have these little popsicles that are "slow melts" and are perfect for toddlers which you can get at any grocery store.  Also around this time I carry antibacterial "wet ones" with me everywhere I go.  I wipe my sons hands down after every little errand or outing.  I keep them in my car and bag to help minimize the germ spread especially around this time of the year when colds are running amuck. I'm hoping that cuts down on some of the potential colds he would have got. 
So to celebrate the beginning of the flu season today my son and I are having a "Day In" of playing and watching some awesome cartoons.  When I say awesome I'm being completely sarcastic.  I think my cold is getting worse in the company of Barney and Thomas the Train but what can you do when you have a 2 year old and feel like crap?  Build a huge train town in your basement which occupied my son for at least two hours.  It was fun watching him play and then come over every time I blew my nose and say "Mommy? Boogies?" Yes he is a complete charmer, ladies love him.  Suprisingly he has been super good today which make me wonder if I should pretend to be sick every now and again......or just build him a huge train town.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Diarrhea's Kryptonite

Goose got his first stomach bug this weekend.  What a horrible thing for a toddler to go through.  I got home late on Saturday night to my fabulous husband cleaning vomit off himself and carrying a stack of clothes and towels down to the laundry.  And so it began...
We spent Saturday night systematically trying to get the poor child to sleep and then inevitably the bug would hit again and another set of Dr. Seuss sheets would wind up in the washer.  By mid-morning Sunday, the bug had moved down the digestive track and well, it was all diarrhea from there.
It's funny how sometimes life throws you a bone.  I had brunched with the playgroup moms on Saturday morning (a rare no-baby outing) and one of the moms was discussing her daughter's recent bout with a nasty stomach bug.  In casual passing, she mentioned that she had switched her daughter to rice milk while she was sick, and that seemed to help quite a bit.
Inevitably, I ended up sending my poor husband out to the grocery to raid the organic aisle for rice milk and white toast.  I said a little prayer and offered Goose the plain, then the vanilla rice milk.  I can't explain the level of relief our house hit when Goose not only drank a good bit of the vanilla rice milk, but then slept all the way through from 7 PM to 5 AM, not waking once to shoot various body fluids out.
This morning, suspecting the bug was only a 24 hour thing, we decided to offer Goose a mix of cow's milk and rice milk, serving only to inspire another round of exorcist-style head spinning vomit.  This round, and the fact that my husband was headed off to work had me calling the pediatric advice nurse this morning.  Sure enough, it was the cow's milk that had him spilling his guts. 
I'm sure we've all heard of the BRAT diet for diarrhea, so rice milk does make a lot of sense in keeping with this plan.  And I'm relieved to be able to offer the poor little guy something when his sick and tragic self runs around asking for milk!

Any other tips or ideas of what's worked for you with a sick baby?

Friday, October 15, 2010

Why God didn't see fit to give me a baby girl

Because I think that dressing your toddler up as Frida for Halloween is pretty much the best idea ever:

Thursday, October 14, 2010

The right to be a frumpadinka

The other day I got a babysister for my two year old and headed out for a little errand run.  Midway through my shopping at the mall I stopped and looked at my reflection in a window and GASP!  I looked like a frumpadinka.  If you don't know what a frumpadinka is it is this according to urban dictionary: A female who is dressed in a sloppy or unfashionable attire.  Thank goodness it was a school day and the mall was very bare because I suddenly became embarrassed for myself.  When did this happen?  When did I not care and just run out the door?  I finished my shopping and immediately headed to Walmart where I would either fit in or look really good compared to most of the shoppers there.  (yeah i said it).   So back to the whole point of this post.  Does having a child give you the right to be a frumpadinka? 

I have made a personal decision that I am no longer a frumpadinka in public.  I do my hair and makeup before going out, unless I'm going to the gym because let's be honest it completely annoys me when girls go to the gym decked out in full on makeup and hair done.  Woman who actually work out at the gym feel this way.  Believe me.  Again I digress!  The only time I'm a frumpadinka is when I'm home and don't plan on going out or having friends over.  I don't want to be one of those woman who dress like that because "Hey, I have an excuse for wearing these sweatpants with holes in them to the grocery store every week because I have kids."  I'll give you a one time pass but if I see you every week with those damn sweatpants I'll tell you girlfriend you are a certified frumpadinka.  I'm not a mom-hater.  I am a mom.  I just don't want to see us give up on ourselves.  Being a mom is wonderful and hard at the same time and we deserve respect and self-respect so next time you are at the mall take a look at your reflection and ask yourself "Am I a frumpadinka?"  You will know believe me. Then go buy some paper towels at Walmart.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Yoga class: how to make a newbie look like an expert!

I made it to yoga today!  Yay!  I could feel how sore my muscles were and this was the perfect break in my regular workout routine of running and weightlifting.  I was so tight, and could tell from the get-go that I wasn't going to be able to get into poses as easily as I usually do, but I feel about a million times better today than I did yesterday.
 I totally understand that yoga is not for everyone.  I don't think there is any workout that is great for everyone.  Truthfully, your best workout is the one you enjoy doing.  If you don't enjoy it, you won't be motivated to work out and then you're getting nowhere!  That doesn't mean everyone can't benefit from yoga - they can, and it's a great workout for people with injuries or to counterbalance some of the more punishing workouts (like running or lifting - as I mentioned above).  I believe in trying everything twice - and seeing if it works for you - so if you're thinking of trying yoga - I have some tips!

If you are a yoga 'virgin':
If you're headed to your first yoga class there are a few things to consider.  First of all - there are many, many different types of yoga.  And many different ways and places to practice.  You can do yoga at a studio, at your gym, on the beach, on your living room floor, in a hotel room - yoga and running are two of the least expensive and most portable sports you can find!    I strongly recommend trying yoga out with a class.  Licensed yoga instructors have to go through pretty thorough training and their job is to help you to get into poses in a safe way.  You really want to make sure that you are doing the poses correctly so that you are getting the most out of your session and avoiding injury.  So get yourself to a classroom! 
Most gyms and studios offer Introductory classes, but if you can't make it to an intro class, that doesn't mean you can't go.  My gym doesn't offer intro classes.  They have more or less strenuous classes, but every class offers variations in the difficulty of the poses. 

What to wear:
Obviously yoga pants are everywhere.  They are super comfortable and actually more frequently seen on stay-at-home moms than at the gym, but if you happen to have a pair of yoga pants, by all means, throw them on!  If not, then I would go ahead and wear a pair of longer workout pants or light sweatpants.  Why am I recommending pants?  Because downward facing dog is a pretty instrumental pose in most yoga classes, and it's not necessarily a pose you want to be doing in booty shorts with someone standing behind you!
On top you want something that allows the full range of motion for your arms - a sleeveless top is a great option or a loose fitting tee.  Now, for reasons similar to the pants factor, I recommend a long, fitted tank top on top.  There are poses that will allow unfitted tops to slide forward and bring your t-shirt up over your head.  Obviously that wouldn't fit into yoga best practices, so keep it simple!  Today I work knee-length running pants and a long tank top to class.  It was perfect :)

How to keep your gas in check!
Ah...the big question!  How to not be "that guy/girl" who stinks up the class!  Well, every yoga class is different - as mentioned before, so I feel like I should mention that some yoga will be stinkier than others!  No matter how you try to avoid it, there will be a farter in a prenatal yoga class.  It's a fact of life.  Pregnant women fart.  A lot.  The good thing about farting in prenatal yoga is that next week it'll probably the the woman next to you who is the farter - so there's no reason to stress. 
Now for the rest of us?  I do have some tips:
#1.  Watch what you eat!  Please don't stop at Chipotle or Taco Bell 1-2 meals before your yoga class.  Same for munching on broccoli or cabbage salads!  And if you do eat those things before class, don't be surprised if the farter is you. 
#2.  It's not just what you eat...It's also how much you eat.  Before yoga, a light snack is in order.  This morning I had coffee, and a banana with some peanut butter.  After class, Goose and I got smoothies.  Be gentle with your stomach, and it will do you the favor of not embarrassing you.
#3.  This should be obvious, but use the restroom before class.  If you can poop before class, do so.  We would all rather you be disruptive and show up 5 minutes late than you get there on time and stink up the place. 
#4.  If you think you might stink, go to the back of the class.  I speak from experience, it is no fun to be behind a stinky yogi.  And if you think those silent but deadly farts are going unnoticed, I assure you, you are mistaken.

Get to Class!!
One you pick out a class time that works for you, try to get to class a few minutes early.  Introduce yourself to the instructor, let your instructor know that you're a newbie so that you may need some extra guidance, and then find a spot, ideally one where you can view yourself in a mirror.  Different classes offer different props.  Mine offers blankets and blocks.  Grab yourself one of each if they're available.  Both can help you make poses more comfortable and to get into certain poses that require extra assistance. 
Really try to concentrate on the poses, watch yourself in the mirror to check your alignment and your poses.  And relax!  Yoga is fun!

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Response to your Schedule gone awry.....

Oh B that stinks!  Ugh!  I hate it when that happens and it makes me unmotivated to work out.  You get all excited to do a class and boom - change of plans.  Well on days when I want to take it easy I don't do yoga just because the last time I took a yoga class I was the object of ridicule.  Seriously sis, you know how uncoordinated I am and for some reason balancing on one leg for a long period of time isn't me.  It was my first class and every move the instructor would come by and correct me or I couldn't last long in a pose and fall over.  So embarrassing!  I envy all those that have balance.  Also I kept it true that people fart in yoga class and no one acknowledges it or laughs? For me that would be the hardest thing not to do is laugh.  So throughout the whole class I was listening very carefully for a fart.  Maybe that was why I was falling over?  Who knows but now you have my background on why I don't do yoga.
Anyway I'm straying from topic....on days that I do a low key workout I usually do a really good stretch in the beginning and I'm talking about stretching each muscle for a good 2 minutes each.  This should take a least 15-30 minutes depending on how tight you are.  Then I would do a nice brisk walk on the treadmill for 30-45 minutes.  There is a great walking workout on a blog that I read called  She has some really great treadmill workouts that I do sometimes which make the workout not boring because you know how boring the treadmill can be.  I mean you can only people watch for so long.  If you are not a treadmill type then yeah the eliptical can be a great cardio if you want to get a little sweaty but not feel like you are going to pass out when you are done.  If you are looking for a really light workout that is what I would do instead of yoga.  Also stretch again after your cardio just so you feel loose and relaxed after especially if you did a hard workout previously.  Hope that helps...that is my sisterly advice. 

Schedules gone awry....

I REALLY needed some yoga today.  Really.  After running the Warrior Dash on Sunday, then doing a full regular workout on Monday, my body was aching for some quiet time and the chance to work the kinks out.  How do things never work out the way I plan?  Having checked out the schedule at the gym on Sunday, I realized I could take an 8 AM yoga class, IF I get Goose, my 15 month old son, to the gym right when the daycare opens.

In typical fashion, Goose uncooperatively cooperated, by waking up at 6:30.  He also managed to wake up at 1AM, and 2:30 AM, so I was not necessarily bright eyed and busy tailed at 6:30, but we were up, and the likelihood of getting to the gym at 8 was definitely high.  After making Goose french toast and strawberries, which he happily dropped on the floor to supplement our dog, Mojo's breakfast, and getting him dressed and out the door, we managed to walk into the gym right at 8 AM.  I rushed Goose to the daycare, had a remarkably drama-free drop off, and rushed up to the yoga studio.  Which was...empty.  A quick discussion with a nearby personal trainer revealed that the schedule changed and tomorrow is the 8 AM yoga class. So we'll try again tomorrow...

But in the meantime, what workout would you do on a day like this?  Because with the frequency that my gym mixes up the class schedule, or the frequent likelihood that I would just be too late for my planned class regardless, I feel like I need a good workout for days when I'm planning on taking it easy on my body.  Today I just did the elliptical, which was fine, but not the workout I wanted.

So what's your low-key workout?